


Consumed

by dmumts



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Angst, F/M, Fluff, Oblivious
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-23
Updated: 2019-02-23
Packaged: 2019-11-04 08:13:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,181
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17894780
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dmumts/pseuds/dmumts
Summary: You had no idea how someone who was once barely an acquaintance managed to consume your life.





	Consumed

Late again.

Your eyes had been stuck on the same paragraph for more than ten minutes as you tried to concentrate on the words, but you couldn’t fully register what they meant. Defeated, you closed the book, placing it on the table in front of you. To your surprise, the once empty seat that faced you was now taken up by a familiar face, a small, amused smile on his lips as you stared back at him.

You barely knew Jongin enough to consider him an acquaintance, much less a friend. The only thing you knew about him was that you shared a friend; Baekhyun, who still hadn’t shown up. You figured he had shown up to meet with Baekhyun as well, but no one mentioned that to you.

Jongin was attractive and kind, but that was just about all you knew about him. He never stuck around long enough for you to say anything other than ‘hello’ and ‘goodbye,’ and you were much too nervous to deliberately say anything further. So, instead of engaging in a conversation with him, you picked your book back up, frustration bubbling inside of you once you encountered the same mental blockage.

“I’ve read that book,” you heard, causing you to slowly put down your book. “I-It was frustrating to read, but, um… I guess it was worth it in the end.”

It was then that you realized that Baekhyun usually served as a bridge between both of you. You’d say something, Baekhyun would respond to you, and then he’d respond to Baekhyun, and vice versa. You had spoken to each other, but never directly. This was the first time he had spoken to you openly without the help of Baekhyun, but you had no idea how to feel about it. You’d always thought his voice exhibited a large amount of confidence, yet while speaking to you, he seemed timid, like he was just as nervous and awkward as you were. “I’m frustrated because nothing’s sticking,” you mumbled, finally placing the book back down.

“Oh, well… good luck,” he sighed as he slouched in his seat, looking around for Baekhyun. You didn’t know when to expect him, but you desperately needed him to come; not only to yell at him for being so late, but also to take away the awkwardness of the situation. “How late is he?”

“Nearly an hour,” you replied. He raised his eyebrows in shock, then shook his head. “Yeah, I know,” you groaned.

“Are you as hungry as I am?” he asked as he looked at the menu, his tongue running over his bottom lip once his eyes landed on something specific.

“Starving,” you sighed, picking up your menu as well. You thought you’d be respectful and wait for Baekhyun before ordering, but you figured he had lost that privilege about thirty minutes ago. Besides; it wasn’t just you, and he couldn’t be mad at both of you.

“I understand why you’re uncomfortable,” he said as he placed his menu down. “I’m not too comfortable either, but I, um… I guess it would be nice to actually talk to you,” he said with a shrug, pretending to come off as casual when his tone was anything but. “From what Baekhyun’s told me, we have a lot in common, but I’d rather hear it straight from you.”

You were somewhat alarmed, wondering exactly what Baekhyun had said about you. Things you’d interpret as embarrassing didn’t translate the same way to him all the time. Like the story of you getting drunk and nearly kissing someone you would have otherwise found repulsive; that was embarrassing to you, but just another funny story to him. “Like what?” you asked cautiously.

“Reading, and, um…” he looked upwards in an attempt to remember, but he ended up shrugging, his lips in a straight line. “Come to think of it, that’s pretty much all he’s told me,” he said, nervously biting his lip. “I’m sorry, I don’t know what to say,” he sighed. “What do you like to do?”

“I play video games sometimes, but I’m not very good at it,” you shrugged. “Reading is at the top of my list, but for some reason, this is just…” You sighed, tapping the cover of the book before shoving it in your bag. “It’s not that it’s boring or anything, I just can’t focus.” At that point, you were just venting, not necessarily to him, but more so in general.

“I… I think, um…” he hesitated, unsure of how exactly to word his sentence, even though it seemed so simple. “I can help. If you’d like, of course.”

You raised an eyebrow, interested in exactly how he’d be able to help, but declined with a shake of your head regardless of your curiosity. “Thanks, but I don’t plan on continuing to read it until I go home,” you said, nervously chewing your bottom.

You thought the awkwardness had cleared up just a little bit, but it had gone back to being thick and heavy, both of you slumped back in your seats, eyes darting around the room. That was until he sat up, drumming his fingers against the table, looking directly at you. “A-Are you single?”

You nearly choked at the question, but you managed to swallow it back. You weren’t expecting that at all, and to say it caught you off guard was an understatement. “I, um… relationships aren’t my focus right now,” you explained. “Why did you ask?”

“It’s just… well, you’re pretty, so I was just curious, I’m sorry,” he sighed before picking up a salt packet that was lying on the table.

You couldn’t help but blush at his compliment, but you also tried to play it off, as if it was something you heard all the time and therefore didn’t faze you. “It’s fine. Thank you,” you said, your voice faltering, completely destroying the casual vibe you wanted to give off.

He smiled at you, and just as he was about to speak again, Baekhyun rushed in, giving you both apologetic smiles as he sat down. “I’m sorry, I overslept,” he apologized, but you didn’t bother to chew him out like you had planned to. Instead, you focused more on the way Jongin’s smile caused your stomach to tug, much like the corners of his mouth.

For the rest of the day, Baekhyun had gone back to being the bridge between you, but this time, you had occasionally caught Jongin stealing glances, and you were guilty of doing the same. You didn’t think Baekhyun had noticed how weird things seemed between you, and that was all you needed to push the whole situation behind you. It wasn’t like you saw him too often, so there was no need to worry about him.

 _Pretty_. You couldn’t get it out of your head, even when you spoke to Baekhyun. You had replied properly, and you seemed interested in the conversation, but all you could hear was Jongin’s smooth voice calling you pretty bouncing around your head, your heart racing each time you heard it. It was only made worse when you caught him smiling at you once again.

As conversations died down, Baekhyun had decided to pay for the food as an apology for being so late, and soon enough, you were going your separate ways. Then, you felt a slight tug on your arm, and you turned around to see Jongin’s dazzling smile, a smile that looked like he was trying to hold it back, but eventually gave up on trying to hide it. “I-I don’t exactly know how to ask this without seeming weird,” he stuttered, “but, can I have your number?”

You blinked at him, unsure of how to respond, even if the answer was either yes or no. But looking at his nervous smile had made your brain foggy enough to rob you of all words, so you just stood there, mouth open slightly while watching his smile slowly falter. Once he was just about to apologize and leave you alone, you quickly nodded, and he shoved his phone in your hand, the smile returning to his face.

You wordlessly said goodbye to each other, and on your entire way home, you couldn’t stop thinking about him. There was nothing specific about him that you thought about; it was just  _him_ , all the moments you’d spent barely acknowledging him only to have him have such an impact on you, and you still had no idea why.

You wondered if he was thinking about you too.

The next day, you had completely forgotten about you giving him your number. You were reading the book again, or at least attempting to, when you heard your phone ringing. It was unsaved, and normally, you’d ignore it, but you soon remembered who was possibly on the other end, so you picked it up.

“Hello?” you answered.

“Hi, it’s Jongin,” he began, taking a deep breath. “I know we don’t hang out alone, but I was wondering if you wanted to meet me later?”

You heard the nervousness laced in his voice, and you could tell he put a lot of effort into calling you. It was weird how you’d been around each other for so long, yet now is when you had actually talked to each other. And even though you didn’t expect or anticipate it, you were glad that the time had finally come. You were interested in knowing more about him; the things that Baekhyun would never tell you, or things you never picked up on before. “Where?”

“At my house,” he said with more of a questioning tone in the air. “We can meet somewhere else, though, if—”

“So, will you pick me up, or are you going to text me your address?” you ask, cutting him off in an act of boldness. You felt your heart pounding after the words left your mouth.

“I can pick you up,” he said excitedly. “What time?”

“Well, I’m free now…”

“Then it’s settled,” he said, nervously laughing at the end.

After you had given him your address and hung up, you immediately jumped up to get ready. You didn’t think you’d be so nervous; your stomach had been in knots the entire time you got dressed just thinking about being in his space. You weren’t sure what to expect, being alone with him. You weren’t sure if things would be awkward the whole time, or if you’d hit it off, or if you’d just being grinning at each other like fools.

When he came to get you, you were both silent, his focus on the road while your focus was on your fluttering heart as you breathed in his scent, as well as his sharp jawline and how perfect his side profile was.

The walk into the house was silent as well. The house was spacious, your every footstep echoing throughout. He plopped down on the couch, a small, shy smile on his face. “Well…This is my home,” he said, gesturing to the space around him. “I tried to clean as best as I could, but I’m sorry if I missed some things.”

It wasn’t spotless by any means, but it wasn’t dirty to the point where you felt uncomfortable. In fact, seeing a single sock lying on the floor made him seem less intimidating; less perfect. You took a deep breath as you sat down next to him, hands on your lap as you looked around. It was neat for the most part, with a cluster of pictures hung up on one side of the wall. Mostly of him and his family, his smile bright and genuine.

“So…” he spoke up, shifting in his seat uncomfortably. “Would you like something to drink? Something to eat?”

You shook your head, and he looked like he had no idea what else to say. So, you tried to ignore your stomach fluttering to attempt to make some conversation. “You never told me why you’re single,” you said, your voice soft as you spoke.

He raised his eyebrows, a smile on his face as he looked away bashfully. “Who says I’m single?”

You shrugged. You felt a little bit at ease now that conversations were flowing, so you leaned back in the chair, taking a deep breath to calm your nerves a little bit more. “Well, I don’t think you’d invite me over if you weren’t single,” you replied.

“I mean… It’s not like I’m trying to date you,” he said.

His laugh seemed quieter than it really was as your thoughts dulled the sound around you. He  _wasn’t_ trying to date you, and you weren’t trying to date him, yet you feel a pang in your heart when the words leave his mouth. You weren’t ready for a relationship, and you certainly weren’t ready to even think about it, but you can’t help but feel a lump form in your throat.

“It’s funny how I would’ve killed for you to be sitting here with me a few months back,” he said, his tongue running across his lip as looks off into the distance. “You’re kind of intimidating, you know. It’s not you’re fault; you’re just… pretty,” he said with a shrug. “It’s why I was so scared to admit that I had a crush on you back then. But, it’s over now.”

You felt your heart sink, and you started to realize that maybe you do have feelings for Jongin. You knew you were attracted to him; that’s why you were nervous to talk to him in the first place. But with the way your stomach fluttered and churned, how your heart raced whenever he was around, you quickly realized that you weren’t just attracted to him, and that you had somehow harbored some feelings for him. “Oh,” you said quietly. You swallowed down the lump and take a deep breath. “You shouldn’t have been intimidated by me when you’re gorgeous,” you finally replied.

You saw him getting a bit flustered, laughing awkwardly as he shook his head. “No, no…” he laughed. His laugh rattled  your chest, and you can’t help but smile at how melodic the sound was. “I hope you don’t feel weird about what I said.”

“Of course not,” you said, a fake smile plastered on your face. It wasn’t like you weren’t enjoying your time with him; it was just that you had a lot to process. You hadn’t dated anyone in years, and your experience with dating wasn’t extensive either. Plus, you realized at the worst possible time that you had a crush on him; when he no longer had feelings for you.

He reached over and touched your hand, taking a deep breath before he speaks. You feel your stomach flip as he gazed into your eyes, his mouth slightly open like he’s struggling to find the right words to say. “Well, I…” he trailed off, looking down at his hand on your, shaking his head. “I’m just glad we got the opportunity to get to know each other. You seem like a really nice person.”

You smiled at him, trying to stop your eyes from welling up with tears. “You seem really nice too.”

You’d been spending a lot more time with him; more time than you’d ever spend with Baekhyun in a week. You eventually learned how to stifle your feelings enough to genuinely enjoy your time with him. Unfortunately, you had clue how long you’d be able to keep up the charade, so you took a day off and decided to just spend the day with Baekhyun, since you’d been blowing him off to spend time with Jongin.

He was eyeing you carefully, eyes squinting as if he’s trying to pick up something about you. You rolled your eyes and playfully shove him. “You’re not the only one I can hang out with, you know,” you said with a smile. “Just say you missed me and get it over with you.” You brushed past him and sat on his couch, sighing when your muscles relax.

“I did, but…I never expected you to hang out with Jongin without me. If I remember correctly, you barely said a word to him,” he said, playfully ruffling your hair, bending over the back of the couch. “So, why are you suddenly so into him?”

You knew he’d press you until you told him the truth, but it didn’t mean that you wouldn’t at least try to play it off anyway. “You showed up late last time; we were basically forced to talk to each other. And he’s really nice,” you said with a shrug.

“He really is nice, but that doesn’t explain why you haven’t invited me along once.” Then his eyes widened and his mouth hung open slightly, before he smiled and began poking your shoulder. “You have a crush on him,” he teased, giggling like a child. “Don’t even try to deny it. I never thought you’d admit it, but—”

“I still haven’t admitted anything, Baek,” you said, shaking your head with a smile your face. “I might think he’s kind of cute.”

“Come on, you don’t have to play it off,” he said, playfully nudging you. He made his way around the couch to sit next to you, a goofy grin his face the entire time. “Honestly, it’s fine if you like him. When are you gonna tell him?”

“Never,” you said immediately. “There’s no reason to, so I’m not going to.” You looked away from him, trying to hide the pained look on your face as you fold your arms across your chest.

“If you’re too scared, I can set you up,” he said more seriously. “Or I can tell you what to do to get him to ask you out.”

“No, no, don’t do that,” you sighed. “I’m afraid of him not liking me back, and I don’t think I’m ready to know the answer.”

“Look, the worst that can happen is he doesn’t like you back. He won’t know that you like him, and you can pretend nothing ever happened. Best case scenario is that he likes you back and you’ll have children scrambling around the place in no time.” He grabbed your shoulder and shook you slightly. “Just let me ask and I promise you nothing bad will happen.”

“Baekhyun…”

“What if he does like you and both of you are too scared to do something about it? Then what? Another missed opportunity?”

You raised an eyebrow, then gasped. “You knew he liked me before and you didn’t say anything?”

“No, because I was trying to leave it up to one of you fools to say something, but you guys took months to even speak to each other directly.” He pretended to be angry, but he can’t help but break out into a smile. “If I tell him and he says that he doesn’t have feelings for you anymore, then I promise I’ll let you down gently. But, I can guarantee that he still does; I know how he is.”

Hearing that made your head perk up, and you finally decided that you’d let Baekhyun go along with it. “Fine,” you said, rolling your eyes. “It’s only a crush anyway; I’ll be sad, but not devastated if he doesn’t like me back.”

But you were. Not outwardly, not for everyone to see, but inside you felt your heart racing, your stomach churning, and you suddenly felt light-headed when you heard the words Baekhyun said. “I’m sorry,” he stuttered. “He just…doesn’t feel the same way anymore. At least not enough to pursue a relationship.”

You began to wonder how much harsher his actual words were. “Of course I don’t like her anymore,” is what you had imagined. His smooth, calming voice suddenly making you feel uncomfortable.

You didn’t cry; you were better than that, you thought. Instead, you tried your hardest to pretend it didn’t happen, and that you had never even let yourself get close to Jongin. His smile never made your heart tug, his voice never settled in your ears like an amazing song, and his hugs never made you feel safe and warm like you were meant to be in his arms.

He called you many times after his confession. You either didn’t bother to pick it up, or quickly told him you were busy or that you’re not up for it. You didn’t explain, or apologize; you just hung up before he could question you about anything.

It went on for days, until finally, he showed up at your door, his expression riddled with concern, looking you up and down. You didn’t have the chance to dress properly, so you were just in sweats with messy hair, but you honestly didn’t care about that when the sight of him made your chest feel so heavy that you could barely breathe.

“I-I was worried about you,” he stuttered, hands resting on your shoulders as he stared deeply into your eyes, his own glassy as if he was about to cry. “I’m sorry for just popping up unannounced, but I got really scared that something happened to you, and I…”

You sighed, shrugging his hands off your shoulders as you stare down at your feet. “I’m alright, Jongin. There’s no need to worry; everything’s okay.” You could barely speak over the lump in your throat, and you knew he noticed.

He pulled you into his arms, soothingly rubbing your back before kissing your forehead, an intimate act that confused you. He wasn’t interested in you as anything more than a friend; you knew that, and you were still struggling to accept it. But, to stand there in his arms, breathing in his scent after feeling his lips on your forehead was torture knowing that he didn’t place the same value on it as you did. His hug was a friendly hug, something to cheer you up, because he cared about you as his  _friend_ , and nothing more.

Your tears finally fell, soaking through his shirt. And it felt so bittersweet, finally being able to cry, finally letting your emotions out, but doing so in his arms. But he hugged you tighter, his heart racing against your cheek. “It’s okay. Everything will be fine,” he said quietly.

“No,” you said, shaking your head as you step away from him. “You don’t even know what the problem is,” you mumbled.

“I’m sorry; I just don’t know how to cheer you up,” he sighed.

You bit your lip, trying to calm yourself down, trying to get your mind and your heart to stop racing as he stood in front of you. But you couldn’t; your mind kept screaming at you to tell him how you felt, to tell him that’s why you were sad for seemingly no reason. It wasn’t like you could turn back and pretend everything was fine; you were already a sniveling mess in front of him. So, you took a deep breath and closed your eyes. “I know…I know that you don’t like me as anything more than a friend.”

His eyes darted around the room, confusion written all over his face before he spoke again. “Well…don’t you like me as a friend too?”

You sighed, shaking your head. “No, Jongin. I… like you a lot more than that,” you admitted, feeling your heart pounding against your chest as you spoke. You had no clue how much longer you could keep it up with the way your legs felt wobbly. “I’ve been avoiding you all this time because I wanted to be over you if we ever hung out again so it wouldn’t hurt me too much.”

“A-Are you saying…you like me?” he asked, raising his eyebrows in shock as he slowly walked towards you.

You slowly nodded, biting your lip when you he had gotten so close that you felt the heat radiating off his body. “You don’t have to pretend to be fine with it or anything,” you barely managed to get out. “I understand.”

Suddenly, his finger landed on your chin, lifting your head up to look into your eyes. “I like you too,” he admitted, a relieved laugh falling past his lips. “I have for a very long time. I always thought you were beautiful and amazing, but I didn’t think you were interested in me.”

Your eyes lit up, lips curled into a smile as his other hand fell on your waist, pulling you closer to him. “I can’t believe that…that you actually like me,” you whispered excitedly, his hand cupping your face. “And I can’t believe we’re both oblivious idiots.”

“Doesn’t matter now,” he laughed, lips inching closer to yours. “Because now we know.”

Kissing him made your head swim, your heart fluttering as you feel his smiling lips against yours. And maybe it was too soon to say you were ready to spend a lifetime with him, but it wasn’t hard to picture it while in his arms.

“By the way, in that book—” 

“Don’t spoil it.”


End file.
